Okay shut up. A month isn't THAT bad? Is it? I'll try harder.
Let's see..
- Me and Paul are at 6 monthes! (well, pretty much, we don't actually have an official date so we have a anniversary week : ) aawww.)
- We are fostering a Beagle from beagle paws! His name is Sherman and he is super cute. Though he is a big pain in the ass, sadly I am becoming extremly emotionally attached to him, so I hope someone adopts him soooooon!!!
- School is becoming tiring. Still passing, but losing motivation. Just a few weeks left though, and going to the west coast this weekend! Yay!
- I have sent all the applications off to UBC but still have not heard anything. Sigh. Paul is being very sweet and saying we can go anyways even if I have to do distance at MUN but it just wouldn't be the same. Please let me in!
Other than that not much to say, Saw JFK of MSTRKRFT last weekend! Metric in two weeks! (The night before me last exam..... sigghhhhh....)So, speaking of that, I should get back to Political Science. Yay free trade!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
The past year of my life.
Wedesday, March 4th, 2009: And I know one day when I'm lost in the haze of partying and chemisty tests I will suddenly find myself falling in love.
And I was right! Well, mostly. There were no chemistry tests, well not for me anyways. I have fallen in love, it's true. I guess that's expected to happen after not writing for you know, a year. (sry, sry). Unfortunately though journal, I do have to report that it is not with the boy who I have written so many previous journals of before. Though I am almost positive that is for the best. I know, not completely, just almost. It's hard to completely let go sometimes, but I am working on it.
He left this morning, back to Halifax, with his newest lover, Allison. Would it have been me? Probably not. It's hard to tell sometimes, although it was my fault, I don't know if i ever could have trusted him. I was so angry for so long and I still am sometimes. I want to cry and write love notes and tell him how truly sorry I AM. But i've missed my chance, we're both in love with new people now, we're probably completely different people now. I just wish there was some way I could get closure on that, to know that it was suppose to work out this way, to know that I am the happiest I could be.
Lucky I know I am now. Can you feel the love?
So I guess that would be my major update in the past year (I never did find an irish lover, well.. i did, but it didn't work out). I did have an Irish Blog, though much like this one, it has failed epically. Though much like before, Sarah's blog has inspired me, it is so cute and lovely. Basically, I went all those places, I only missed two planes, and I didn't die. I met two amazing ladies in ireland and spent most of my time traveling with them (Besides when i lost my shit in Budapest).
So I come home extremly poor, was happy for two days and depressed for the rest and one week in Quebec. Bought a house, went back to MUN, stopped failing, found a lover, good thing's do happen.
As of now, well, I am in class so I guess that shows how much of a good student I am. (Though I am no longer failing, or even in the C grade. Watch out A's - I'm coming for you!) and still renovating my house. Living with the dream man, Joemystery, and a lovely new addition to my life, Lenoredo. Or just lenore.
I am going to write soon, and again, and again, I promise.
And I was right! Well, mostly. There were no chemistry tests, well not for me anyways. I have fallen in love, it's true. I guess that's expected to happen after not writing for you know, a year. (sry, sry). Unfortunately though journal, I do have to report that it is not with the boy who I have written so many previous journals of before. Though I am almost positive that is for the best. I know, not completely, just almost. It's hard to completely let go sometimes, but I am working on it.
He left this morning, back to Halifax, with his newest lover, Allison. Would it have been me? Probably not. It's hard to tell sometimes, although it was my fault, I don't know if i ever could have trusted him. I was so angry for so long and I still am sometimes. I want to cry and write love notes and tell him how truly sorry I AM. But i've missed my chance, we're both in love with new people now, we're probably completely different people now. I just wish there was some way I could get closure on that, to know that it was suppose to work out this way, to know that I am the happiest I could be.
Lucky I know I am now. Can you feel the love?
I can.
He is amazing. There for me every second, of every hour, of every day.
So I guess that would be my major update in the past year (I never did find an irish lover, well.. i did, but it didn't work out). I did have an Irish Blog, though much like this one, it has failed epically. Though much like before, Sarah's blog has inspired me, it is so cute and lovely. Basically, I went all those places, I only missed two planes, and I didn't die. I met two amazing ladies in ireland and spent most of my time traveling with them (Besides when i lost my shit in Budapest).
So I come home extremly poor, was happy for two days and depressed for the rest and one week in Quebec. Bought a house, went back to MUN, stopped failing, found a lover, good thing's do happen.
As of now, well, I am in class so I guess that shows how much of a good student I am. (Though I am no longer failing, or even in the C grade. Watch out A's - I'm coming for you!) and still renovating my house. Living with the dream man, Joemystery, and a lovely new addition to my life, Lenoredo. Or just lenore.
I am going to write soon, and again, and again, I promise.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
musique
so... hungover... cramps...
berlin night clubs are definitely something else. i've never just been able to dance like that before, the music was flowing right through me and i was high, but i wasn't! it was honestly better than some of the e dance nights i've had. oh berlin, you are fucked.
berlin night clubs are definitely something else. i've never just been able to dance like that before, the music was flowing right through me and i was high, but i wasn't! it was honestly better than some of the e dance nights i've had. oh berlin, you are fucked.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
what the fuck
3 monthes.
i have been home for 3 monthes.
living with my parents.
no real expenses.
in the exact same financial position i lay in 3 monthes ago.
i think i've lost myself even more.
everything is so clear when i'm high it becomes blurry.
i suddenly realise i don't know myself
how can i expect someone else to know me then?
are my friends suppose to be drifiting away?
am i sppose to be scared to turn 20?
i seem to suddenly have no handle on the reality of life and that within it.
i have been home for 3 monthes.
living with my parents.
no real expenses.
in the exact same financial position i lay in 3 monthes ago.
i think i've lost myself even more.
everything is so clear when i'm high it becomes blurry.
i suddenly realise i don't know myself
how can i expect someone else to know me then?
are my friends suppose to be drifiting away?
am i sppose to be scared to turn 20?
i seem to suddenly have no handle on the reality of life and that within it.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
lusting for love
When I think of fantisizing, the idea of it that comes into my head is people fufulling their sexual desires that they cannot get in the present. But when it comes to my mine, and my fantasizing, I think of really lame couple thing's. Like singing in the car to eachother, meeting the parents, watching movies on crappy days while you bake muffins.
I can honestly say I would take an emotional relationship way way WAY over sex at this point. I parshly blame it on myself... and luck... to some extent... the people i meet that i see as potential always seem to end up in various scenarios such as : enrolled in university at ottawa and just home in st. john's for the long weekend or another one of my favorite's: partying on the other side of the province, just for the weekend. I just want to whisk these people away and take them on all my travels with me but it's all ridiculous thoughts.
Maybe I'm just meeting the wrong people. Maybe it's just me. It's frusterating wanting to be in a relationship, because it seems to never come that way. And I know one day when I'm lost in the haze of partying and chemisty tests I will suddenly find myself falling in love. Perhaps. Hopefully.
I can honestly say I would take an emotional relationship way way WAY over sex at this point. I parshly blame it on myself... and luck... to some extent... the people i meet that i see as potential always seem to end up in various scenarios such as : enrolled in university at ottawa and just home in st. john's for the long weekend or another one of my favorite's: partying on the other side of the province, just for the weekend. I just want to whisk these people away and take them on all my travels with me but it's all ridiculous thoughts.
Maybe I'm just meeting the wrong people. Maybe it's just me. It's frusterating wanting to be in a relationship, because it seems to never come that way. And I know one day when I'm lost in the haze of partying and chemisty tests I will suddenly find myself falling in love. Perhaps. Hopefully.
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